ahah, i can’t …
04/12/2011 at 05:15 | Posted in Uncategorized | Leave a commentTags: biochemistry, grad school, MIA, phd
ahah, i can’t believe this old thing is still here. it’s funny to read my old angry self.
still in phd school and still hacking away at it, but faaar less bitter. something about getting past the qualifying exam (which i didn’t take until THIS sept), just makes a person… see grad school a little differently.
let’s see if i can spruce this old page up a bit in the meantime!
yes! i am a genius!!!
06/07/2010 at 22:00 | Posted in graduate studies | Leave a commentTags: grad school, newton, phdcomics, science
…. according to this comic. 
of course… when all you do all say is stress about your qualifying exam.. mess up experiments and then complain about it on facebook…
right, i got nothing. nap time!
friends
05/07/2010 at 20:08 | Posted in graduate studies, Uncategorized | Leave a commentTags: friends, friendship, grad studies, phdcomics
one of my lab mates laughs whenever i tell her i’m going out with friends and tells me “[mdr410], you need to just lose the friends. that’s the secret to grad school.”
she’s probably right. take this past weekend. a guy i’ve been seeing got himself drunk enough to explain to me what his “true lifestyle” is – then spent the weekend wanting to talk to me about it, instead of letting me move on.
a whole set of friends call me repeatedly telling me “your supervisor works you too hard, tell him you need a life” – yeah, that’ll work.
another couple of friends, who have just graduated with their master’s degrees, are constantly upset with me when i ask for their understanding when i can’t meet up every week.
i’m a nice person, so i don’t want to tell people to eff off, and each of these people is fantastic in his/her own right, but seriously, i am not sure what to do anymore. maybe i should just tell people to call me in *hopefully* four years.
a sampling of a grad student's life
hiatus
22/02/2010 at 18:57 | Posted in graduate studies | Leave a commentTags: classes, grad school, university
i haven’t forgotten about my desire to blog my way through grad school! since my last post i’ve been struggling to keep my head above water. in january i distinctly remember swallowing enough metaphorical water that i allowed myself to say “goodbye world” … and then time caught up to me, and i crashed headfirst into midterm break.
since then i’ve slowed down… no more do i plan on being at school till 2am and returning at 7, taking just enough time to close my eyes and convince myself that that was indeed sleep, and, of course, to shower. no, i plan on slowing down enough to at least be able to function on less than 5 cups of coffee a day!
anyway, needless to say, the world of classes alongside experiments is depressing. goodbye society, goodbye friends, goodbye polite conversation…. and hello colds, dirty laundry, and a non-functional EQ. (i went to a party one night right after a day in the lab, and within 20 min of my arrival, i had managed to insult 3 people and alienate a fourth. at 25 min, i decided to cut my losses and go home. so much for trying to have a social life!)
so, in case you’ve been wondering.. that’s where i’ve been!
until next time….
oh, the holidays…
22/12/2009 at 01:06 | Posted in Uncategorized | Leave a commentTags: christmas, drunk driving, holiday rush, holidays
is there something about the holidays that makes people go insane? i haven’t looked for any studies… but honestly, every year, i gauge the christmas craaaaaze level by how scared i am of other drivers. no joke.
yesterday, one of those little semi trucks couldn’t decide whether he wanted to be in my lane or the one on the right.. and so instead of choosing one and sticking to it until he could figure that out in his sub-average brain, he decided he would just fucking swerve until the truck naturally came to an equilibrium somewhere. i was behind him and wondering whether i could lane change myself, or if i were better off waiting for the next exit… when i noticed the car next to him. i gave the horn a good push. we were on a bridge by this point, and thankfully he took the hint and stayed in his own lane… otherwise i might have been witness to a horrendous collision.
the other day, i was about to turn left, and saw the car coming toward me -
he was slowing down, and it was a yellow, so i figured, he’s about to stop (it’s now illegal in this town to fly through the yellow). no, sir. as soon as i started to turn i realized my mistake. he hadn’t seen the yellow at all, and in fact, even if he was slowing down – that had been by accident. guy looked at me as he flew past with a look of “oh.” yeah, seriously, asshole. learn to fucking drive.
i don’t think we should be as afraid of drunk drivers and cell-phone users as we should be of holiday drivers. see, at least with the former two, they do not form the majority of drivers. but holiday drivers – that’s fucking everyone, man! it’s that guy walking across the street right now… it’s your old grade 2 teacher – it’s even your mom.
so these holidays, folks, take care out there – and watch out for those sober bastards! they’re more likely to hit you than my engineering buddies!
lab cleanup day
19/12/2009 at 05:17 | Posted in graduate studies, science | Leave a commentTags: cleaning, graduate studies, research, science, truthfulnes
today was lab cleanup day.
every 6 months, our tech organizes a lab cleanup day. we all get assigned to various chores, and spend the morning cleaning, purging, and, well… relaxing. it’s one of those days where the boss man sanctions not doing experiments, and then gives you pizza for it. it’s wonderful.
anyway, so something came up today that made me finally come clean to my supervisor about a situation that’s really been bugging me.
you see, for the past 8 months i’ve been living in the shadow of the guy before me… a guy who cut corners, lied, and pretty much bullshitted his way through life. anyway, so along comes me – the proverbial new guy – and i’m stuck with trying to figure out what he actually did vs what he said he did. eight months i’ve been messing things up in the lab, and confused out of my mind because of this douche. i kept my mouth shut because well, at first i didn’t want to seem presumptuous… then i thought, oh well, i’ll just ask another person in the lab… then i thought, oh i’ve made it past the hard part, i can do the rest…. finally, i managed to get to the last step of the experiments …and… i got one THIRD the stuff he got. you can imagine my thoughts/feelings/etc.
F. M. L.
anyway, today, i finally gave in to what my friends have been telling me for ages now… i wrote my supervisor, explained the situation dispassionately, and asked if we could meet so we could go through everything together. this was it… the moment of truth.
i hit send, and told myself “well, you had a good run. you didn’t really want a career in biochem anyway” and went home.
an hour later, the boss man wrote me back. i opened the email… and was astonished at what i heard. he was supremely understanding, and basically said “of course, how can you be expected to know the ins and outs when you’re new?” so we’re meeting on monday.
you have no idea how relieved i am. finally, i’ll be free of the old guy’s shortcuts and on my way to actually getting some research done!
moral of this story: explaining your issues to your supervisor can be a good idea!
ps. lab clean up day is ALWAYS a good idea – even if it’s only to get stuff off your chest!
how badly do i need a break?
16/12/2009 at 22:33 | Posted in graduate studies | 2 CommentsTags: academics, graduate studies, holidays, ps3, university, vacation
well, it appears that my supervisor is more of a hard-ass than i anticipated.
my brother just purchased a ps3 last night, and since he is away for the holidays, he called me and offered to lend it to me until he gets back in january. i, of course, accepted. free ps3 for a month? why, thank you!
so, i was trying to figure out what game to try out first, and mentioned this to one of the girls in the office, who responded with “oh, don’t you know that we have to work over the holidays?” i was like “whaaaat?” and so, according to her, our lab is expected to show up over “supposed” break, even though the university itself is officially closed.
i am, needless to say, in shock. i mean, wtf? don’t i put in enough time already, that you have to take away the one bit of mid-winter sanity that we all work toward every november?! granted, i was thinking about coming in here or there – but i didn’t expect that i’d have to come in. they are two very different situations. in one case, you arrive an hour or two after you wake up… at a leisurely sunday morning pace. in the other: a quick grande pike, shirt on backward, speed through 3 lanes of traffic, all to arrive a half an hour early to get a head start on experiments that will take you until 9pm anyway.
the girl in the lab was like “oh, it’s no big deal, just use your vacation days”
but this is a matter of principle. no other fucking grad student has to be at school that week. why the differential treatment?
anyway. i’m still renting a pile of games and enjoying my evenings to the full. take that! …sir.
a message to non-scientists everywhere….
16/12/2009 at 16:33 | Posted in Uncategorized | Leave a commentTags: philosophy, science
...just follow the light...
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